CRIS-CROSS in the CROSS WALK

How many of you remember Kris-Kross? The duo is most famous for their 1992 hit "Jump", and their fashion styling—consisting of wearing their clothes backwards. I loved them! I remember breakin’ it down at the skating rink. But, because I have been blessed with a big bootie my whole life, I never could partake in fashion styling.

This brings me to my latest “pop-off”-CROSS WALKS. I’m sure you all are so ready to hear what I could possibly have to say about cross walks.

First of all let’s start off with a basic lesson. For those of you who might be scratching your head, or other body part thinking, “gee, what is a cross walk”, let me teach you.

A pedestrian crossing or crosswalk is a designated point on a road at which some means are employed to assist pedestrians wishing to cross. They are designed to keep pedestrians together where they can be seen by motorists, and where they can cross most safely with the flow of vehicular traffic. Pedestrian crossings are often at intersections, but may also be at other points on busy roads that would otherwise be perilous to attempt to cross. They are common near schools or in other areas where there are a large number of children. Crosswalks can be considered a traffic calming technique.

Wait! Did that say “traffic calming”? They are definitely not calming in St. Louis. In recent days I have been almost run down twice, while crossing in a cross walk. No one seems to want to stop, or YIELD to the pedestrian. It drives me absolutely insane.

PEOPLE: the wide-colored lines in the road, or the big yellow sign that says PED X-ING, means STOP, or YIELD to pedestrians that may be trying to cross the street.

Contrary to popular belief, cross walks are not special VIP parking spots, and they are not an artistic impression that the street department placed on the pavement for cars to just run over day-to-day. They actually have a purpose; especially when there are people walking on them.

My all-time favorite is when the drivers actually stop and yell some obscenity, or throw some gesture to the ped. NEWS FLASH: The driver is the law breaker, he doesn’t need to be cursing or gesturing at me! C’mon, pull over and say something to my face. Don’t be a coward and throw it out there as you are speeding by!

So, for the love of God, can everyone just slow down and not to play hit the Prego in the cross walk? Oh, and one other request for those of you working at BJH….Quit parking in the damn cross-walks. I often wonder if these particular offenders think, “hmmm, I wonder why this parking spot looks different than all the others. It must be a special spot only for me.” ADDITIONAL NEWS FLASH: Genius…it’s a cross walk, not a parking spot. Those objects that are walking/wheeling in them are also known as humans. They aren’t plain-clothed valets!

WOW…I love hormones. They rock!